Does Wanting What We Can't Have Make Life More Exciting?

Elle: Courtney Love

“I don't want whatever I want. Nobody does. Not really. What kind of fun would it be if I just got everything I ever wanted just like that, and it didn't mean anything? What then?”
― Neil Gaiman

Why do we always want what we can't have? That bar of chocolate when you are on a strict diet. That item that is way above the price you originally wanted to spend. Or that award that is completely out of reach.   When something suddenly becomes unattainable, it also becomes appealing and the more out of reach it becomes, the more we crave for it. It is a vicious circle.

This strongly relates to me as I am one of those people. The ones that are never satisfied with what they have. They always want more. This is usually not about trivial things such as a bar of chocolate, but more about achievements and goals. I always want to be the best I can be, but I have realised over the years that by the time I reach a goal that I have been striving endlessly for, I have usually made the goal much bigger and harder to obtain. One award becomes two awards, going down to my ideal weight becomes toned, toned becomes having more stamina when running, a good grade becomes a better grade.

I have always questioned why I am like this. Do I just not want to be happy? Am I over-competitive? or am I just plain selfish? Maybe, but that would not be because of this.

Think about it. If we always got what we wanted would life be fun? It is the chase and the sense of achievement that makes life so interesting and seem to have purpose. The thing that is so out of reach becomes a priority, it is always on your mind, which is why you want it so badly. In turn, you feel like everyone else wants it too, making it more important. The more you cannot get it, the more it seems rare and exciting.

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  1. I've always found the chase more appealing than the catch but there's something about immediate chocolate that I just wouldn't mind.

  2. it's just a human nature I guess...:) great post by the way! hope to see you on my blog :)